Cricket is something that holds more value to me than anything else and millions of others on this planet will wholeheartedly agree with me. And being able to write about this in itself is a very exciting prospect, merely because of the role it has and hopefully will continue to have in my life.

"If you aren't struggling to achieve your goals, then you're chasing behind the wrong ones" – is my go-to inspiration whenever I face a problem. But at the same time, it’s hard to prevent myself from thinking- "Why can't things just be easy? Why do I always have to face these problems, why me?"

And that’s where cricket comes into the picture. I started my cricketing journey at the age of 10, at a cricket academy in Singapore. Obviously, I was nervous on my first day, because I had absolutely no idea what to expect there. At the same time, I was excited to meet new people and hopefully, have a great time learning with them. However, things didn’t go the way I wanted them to – as I walked to the nets, all I could see was a bunch of about 20 guys and not a single girl. I was gobsmacked – I simply couldn’t believe it – I ran my gaze over the faces once more to see if I had missed anyone, but guess what – I hadn’t. Somehow, I felt like the "other" throughout my training sessions at the academy, a rather interesting a year and a half of my life. More than the fact that I was the only girl, the thing that my ten-year-old self just couldn’t understand was why I was treated so differently – the other boys, some my age and others younger were given such difficult catches, while the coach just gently rolled the ball towards me when it was my turn. I was constantly mocked by the others; they always told me – ‘ why are you so bad at cricket? Why can’t you do XYZ like us?’ These questions compelled me to doubt my own capabilities. Coming from a family where I had no restrictions even though I was a girl, I couldn’t fathom the fact that the people outside my 'safe zone' didn’t have the same ideologies.

Over the years, I slowly learned to stop caring about their unnecessary comments, although that didn’t go as well as I intended, I managed to survive through it. In 2016, I joined NPS. It was my second week in the school – I didn’t even know my way to the school library – but I knew for a fact that I had to get on to the school cricket team, no matter what! I practiced hard with the team for the next year and a half and even got to play a few matches for them. But one thing that disturbed us all was the fact that we would always play against boys, and always heard comments about how we are weaker, just because we are girls. Initially, it really hurt us – but soon we realized that the only way we could stop this, was by giving them a befitting reply through our performances in the tournament.

All through tenth grade, I didn’t really get a chance to play much as all my time went by in solving past papers (I wish). Honestly, the only place where I could be my true self, or even play a bit of cricket, was during lunch. I think I was lucky to make a few friends there, who were equally, if not even more passionate towards the sport than I was. I learned a lot from them – be it batting techniques, bowling variations, aggression, and competitiveness, or even how to crack jokes (I’m still bad)!

It’s been about four years now, and there hasn’t been a single day I haven’t dreamt of getting into the Nationals. It hurts the most when you see younger, more inexperienced players playing for the team while you just stand there cheering for them in the pavilion. It feels almost impossible to bridge that gap between being a spectator and being a player – no matter how much effort you put in – it continues to seem impossible.

Sooner or later, I realized that although making it to the Nationals would change my life forever, it shouldn’t be the only reason to play cricket. I realized that the only way I could become a successful human being, is by living for myself – and not for the sake of others.

The matter of fact is that no matter what sport you play, play it for yourself, play it to achieve your personal goals. It’s true that no one remembers the one who comes ‘second’, but that’s okay – as long as you have learned something from the process, you are already a winner! So, to all the people out there passionate about sports or anything else, for that matter – learn to live for yourself and love everything you do because if you don’t love and appreciate yourself, you can’t expect that from others around you. Always thrive to be the best version of yourself, and don’t worry, it’s never too late to let go of your fears and unlock the key to your success – loving and accepting your true self.

“It’s not about doing great things, it’s about doing something worth remembering!”

Signing off until next time,
Smriti Anand (edited by – Shreya Ghosal)