by Aditya Bhatia
Well, it’s that time of the year again! Shop windows are draped in red, couples exchange chocolates and roses, and the pressure to be romantic hangs heavy in the air. As the calendar flips to the month of February, we begin to recognise the importance of love in our lives. While love is the feeling we associate with Valentine’s Day, we often forget to celebrate the most fundamental love of all: self-love. Whether you’re running solo and thriving, or coupled and content (or maybe somewhere in between), Valentine’s Day presents all of us the chance to rediscover ourselves and turn the narrative inward.
Growing up, I never really understood the meaning of the word ‘love’, or what importance it holds. I always believed that focusing more on myself and prioritising my needs would make me feel disconnected from others, whether it be family or friends. Arguably, I still have no idea of the true significance behind this word. This was (or still is) because love is intangible – unlike a rose, you cannot hold it, and unlike ballads, you cannot capture its exact tune.
However, my understanding of love strongly deepened when I came to realise that it is akin to a guitar!
Initially, the music love produces is discordant, but over time as we tune the strings of love and practice playing music, we begin to produce melodies unique to us. To keep the strings intact and the guitar polished we maintain it with care. However, the idea of love being a guitar got quite confusing for me when I realised there are uncountable songs for us to play using this guitar. Eventually, I realised that this allows us to continue exploring the depth behind this unique instrument that we all possess, either through love or self-love.
The heartstrings of our love are initially in a knot when we are unsure about how to channel our inner emotion of love, however, they begin to rearrange themselves as we find personal growth. They then strengthen when we nurture them with kindness, communication, and most importantly, self-appreciation. Just like the delicate strings on a guitar, these invisible connections vibrate with every act of affection, every shared moment, and every unspoken understanding, thus producing beautiful music. Quite an exemplary analogy to comprehend ‘love’, isn’t it?
However, the problem with love is that people only associate it with an external connection, not realising that it also encompasses self-love, or building a strong foundation within. Self-love is all about appreciating yourself more, understanding your strengths, working on your weaknesses and putting happiness and well-being as your top priority. With this revelation, I tried sleeping on time, planning my week in advance to avoid stress as well as dedicating enough time to recuperate after a long week. Starting with just a few small changes to my routine, I managed to channel self-love towards a healthy purpose.
I used to set unrealistic expectations for myself which made it difficult to maintain self-love. Such pressures make it arduous to find time for ourselves, clear our minds, or do anything that can contribute to self-love. However, it is in these situations that I remind myself of my worth, take a break when needed, and remember to celebrate the small accomplishments that usually go unnoticed.
“When you reach the end of your rope,” said Franklin D. Roosevelt, “tie a knot in it and hang on.” Self-love can be this knot when one feels like giving up, helping you climb back up to the edge you fell from. Self-love is not narcissism, it enables us to increase self-empathy without diminishing the compassion we have for others. So, as you read this, remember to love yourself – prioritise your needs, accept yourself as you are and set healthy boundaries. Make this season of love a season of self-discovery, self-compassion and self-respect.
The Casual Observer 